bowling for votes

April 1, 2008

Following a speech before hundreds of labor union members, the press was told Hillary Clinton would hold a press conference. The press sat patiently for Clinton to finish shaking hands with supporters in the other room. Within minutes, a somber looking Clinton approached the podium, her equally morose looking staff stood nearby.

“I want to take a moment to say that this has been a very hard fought race. Each of us is drawing enormous support. We clearly need to do something so that our party and the people can make the right decision,” Clinton said. At this point many in the press thought Clinton might drop the bomb that she is calling it quits in the race. But it soon became clear that Clinton was only joking.

“Today I am challenging Senator Obama to a bowl off, a bowling night, right here in Pennsylvania winner take all,” said Clinton as the press chuckled.

“I will even spot him 2 frames. It’s time for his campaign to get out of the gutter and allow all of the pins to be counted. I am prepared to play this game all the way to 10th frame. And when this game is over the America people will know when that phone rings at 3am they will have a president who will be able to bowl on day one so let’s strike a deal and go bowling for delegates. We don’t have a moment to spare, because it’s already April Fools Day, so happy April Fools Day everybody.”

Knowing that a little humor will go a long way, and understanding that she has very little of it to give, Hillary reserves her human side for the darkest hour, when nothing else will tip the scales in her direction. Viva la Hillary!